


Fate in Balance

by altargaryen



Series: Balancing the Scales of Fate [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Engagement, Epilogue, F/M, Fluff, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Ghost(s), Hair Braiding, Pregnancy, Varykino (Star Wars)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2019-11-15 02:11:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18064586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/altargaryen/pseuds/altargaryen
Summary: An epilogue of one-shots from a world postScales of Fate.WhileScales of Fateis not required reading to enjoy this load of domestic fluff, I do highly recommend giving the story a read.





	1. A Name

He found her working in the hangar, the long plait he’d braided in her hair earlier that morning falling loose at her neck as she twisted some new part into place on the underside of their ship. The sleek Mandalorian dress he’d bartered her into wearing, now covered in grease stains, had been torn at the knee, revealing the ratty old boots she insisted on wearing. It was quite the look, and if he couldn’t feel her teetering just on the edge of a breakdown following the disaster of a meeting she’d fled from, he would’ve told her so.

Instead he approached with caution, reaching out through the bond to ensure she knew he was there, testing the waters to see if it was safe to speak.

“Look, before you say anything, I’m sorry.” She grumbled, the toned muscles on her arms flexing as she screwed in a particularly stubborn nut. “I know I shouldn’t have run out like that. Drardos was just so… so….”

“Arrogant?” He offered, leaning against the hull. “Narrow-minded? Tactless?”

Rey scoffed. “Are you describing Drardos, or yourself?”

“Hey now.” He feigned offense. “I’d like to think I’ve made progress in that department.”

Rey grunted, eliciting a sly smile from him as he bent down in time to watch her finish her battle with the last remaining bolt on whatever new system she’d installed on their ship. He knew better than to tell her she looked adorable like this, but it didn’t change the fact that it was true. She had a far healthier way of dealing with her emotions than he did, something she was happy to remind him of whenever he questioned her need to “upgrade” the ship he’d gifted her, and he didn’t have the heart, or the desire, to try and stop her.

“Well, he _was_ arrogant. And narrow-minded and tactless.” She continued, crawling out from under the ship, wiping her hands clean in the fabric of her dress.

She plopped down on the ground unceremoniously, grabbing her tools from under the ship and sorting them into their place in her tool box. He followed suit, unconcerned with who might see them this way.

“But that’s not why you left.” He pressed, leaning in the brush a stray hair behind her ear gently.

She turned away, and he felt a deep sadness settle over her. He’d asked a lot of her. Far more than she’d promised him and certainly more than she’d ever wanted. Yet she continue to stand by his side unflinchingly, tolerating the dull meetings, heated debates, and tense trials like a seasoned pro. The weight of it had taken its toll, and she never hesitated to voice her frustration when they were alone. But she’d sat through far worse than the meeting today without flinching.

No. Rey hadn’t left the meeting because of she was angry. She hadn’t left when Drardos tossed away perfectly good food with a sneer. She hadn’t left when he’d snidely commented on Ben’s age, backhandedly questioning his qualifications to lead. She hadn’t even left when he made his distaste for the slave initiative she was championing known. She’d left because she was sad. Devastatingly so. He felt it creep over her as the minutes dragged on until it consumed her, and he hadn’t needed to look into her eyes to know she needed the escape. It was why he’d let her go, turning back to Drardos’s stunned coalition without blinking an eye. What he didn’t know, and what he still hadn’t figured out, was what it was that made her feel this way.

He leaned forward, trying to force her to look at him. “What is it Rey?”

Rey gulped, finally looking up at him with a weighty sigh, tears threatening at the corners of her eyes.

“His family is important.” She stated flatly. Ben furrowed his brow, unsure he understood why that was relevant.

“On Mandalore, yes.”

“No. I mean, his family is important to him. He couldn’t stop talking about them.” She shook her head shamefully. “It’s just... I don’t have a family name, or a title, or anything that ties me to anyone else. I never have. I’m just Rey.”

“What’s wrong with that?” Ben squinted, nudging her slightly. “I happen to like _just_ Rey quite a lot.”

“Nothing.” She shook her head. “To me. And to you, maybe. Or my friends. But when we go before these people… All they see is a name, or a title, or a uniform. That’s what matters to them. That’s what gives your opinions validity.”

Ben looked at her thoughtfully, thinking back on their meeting with the Mandalorian Ambassador. Drardos had certainly not shied away from emphasizing his family’s significance to Mandalore, nor his pride in his children and their accomplishments, but Ben hadn’t given the quips so much as a second thought. Then again, _of course_ he hadn’t. He too had royal blood in his veins. And no one would deny that his own family’s impact on the history of the galaxy far surpassed the legacies of everyone else. The name Kylo Ren instilled fear, but Solo? Organa? Skywalker? Those were the names of heroes. Names he and he alone held claim to. They held power. Power he took advantage of without even realizing it.

And while he’d resented those legacies growing up, shed those names like the family who’d given them to him, shedding a name required having one to dispose of in the first place.

“Drardos is a small man using his family's accomplishments to prop himself up.” Ben insisted. “ _You_ are something far greater than that. You’ve lived through hardships neither he nor I could possibly imagine. You’ve fought for everything you have and you’ve earned it. That makes you far more valuable than some arrogant aristocrat. I don’t care what his title is.”

She smiled sadly, shaking her head at the toolbox in her lap. “It’s not just that.”

“What then?”

She sighed, looking out across the hangar before dropping her gaze down to her hands. “The way he spoke of them, of his family…” She twisted the ripped end of her dress between her hands, “Leia talks about you that way. And Max about Rose.” A stray tear fell down her cheek, and he reached forward to catch it in the air. “I know I don’t need a family name or a title to have value. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting to watch others belong somewhere when you don’t.”

His chest constricted painfully as he pulled her in against his chest, running his hand down her arms as he cradled her there. This conversation had been a long time coming. He’d sensed it bubbling up within her from time to time. They’d ironically been on Chandrila the first time he’d recognized it for what it was.

He’d taken her to his childhood home. Or, rather, she’d begged him to take her and he, helpless against her charms, eventually relented, despite the festering dread that prevented him from keeping any food down from the moment he’d begrudgingly agreed. She’d been excited, giddy even. But as he’d watched her explore his boyhood toys and drawings, her curiosity morphed into longing before his very eyes. She’d comforted him through his own torment at facing down the one place he’d ever felt loved, but her pain was distinct from his. Where he felt loss and shame and remorse when he looked at the old family pictures his mother left hanging on the walls, she saw a family. A family that she was in many ways a part of now, but that would never quite replace the one taken from her.

She’d dragged him out onto his parent’s old balcony that night, wrapping herself around him and forcing their entwined bodies to sway to the music echoing up from the streets below. And it was in that moment that he knew. He wanted to belong to her, and she to him. Not in a manner of possession, but as a promise. A commitment. He wanted her to be his family in every way that she possibly could, and to give her the belonging she so deserved.

The words had very nearly tumbled out of his mouth the first time they’d made love, desperate and clumsy in the cockpit of their ship, having narrowly avoided death in the asteroid field outside of Annamar, her hands twisted in his hair, moaning his name as he buried himself inside of her over and over again. It had taken all of his admittedly minimal willpower not to beg her right then and there, and it had taken a restraint he didn’t know he was capable of each and every time she’d allowed him to love her since.

But asking Rey to marry him while in the throes of passion seemed wrong somehow. He wanted to give her more time, to make sure that it was what she wanted. That _he_ was really what she wanted. She needed to be fully aware of what she was agreeing to, something she would not be with his tongue between her thighs. And so he resisted despite himself. But once the idea sprouted in his mind, it grew like a weed and while he kept the words from spilling out, he was utterly incapable of cutting it off in his mind.

When, a few months later, she still hadn’t signaled any intention to leave, he’d started devising more romantic plans. He’d considered taking her to Takodana, to the forest where they’d first met, but quickly realized that it was just about the least romantic place he could take her, considering her reaction upon seeing him for the first time had been to shoot to kill. He debated going back to Chandrila, or Naboo, or Endor. He’d even considered sneaking away to Ahch-To, to where they’d first touched hands across the stars, but eventually he nixed that idea as well. There were too many ghosts on that island, too many painful memories of rejection and loneliness. The opposite of everything he wanted her to feel when he finally worked up the nerve to ask her to be with him forever.

Up to this point, nothing had felt quite right. He didn’t know when it would, only that when he finally worked up the courage to ask Rey to marry him, he wanted to moment to be perfect.  

Which was why he was surprised to find himself here, sitting on the floor of some hangar in Keldabe, with Rey covered in sweat, and grease, and dust, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that this was it.

“You know,” he began slowly, brushing his lips against her temple. “I could give you a name. And a title. If you wanted.”

She scoffed, pushing away to glare at him like he’d missed her point completely. “I don’t want some random name Ben.”

“No, not a random one.” He murmured, playing with a stray thread on the end of her dress. “I could give you _my_ name.”

She turned to him with a furrowed brow, looking at him like he’d just made the most ridiculous suggestion. “What are you talking about? I can’t just take _your_ name. The only way for me to do that would be to…”

She froze as the implication of his words finally dawned on her, her mouth falling open as her eyes blew wide.

“You’d have to marry me, yes.”

Rey turned slowly, looking up at him like he was some sort of three headed loth cat.

His heart was beating so rapidly in his chest he could barely hear himself think. For all the time he’d spent lying awake thinking of what he would say to her, he was wholly unprepared him when the moment finally came. So instead he turned to her on the ground, reaching forward to take her hands in his own, hoping that whatever tumbled out of his mouth next made a modicum of sense.

“Rey, I love you. Everything about you. Exactly the way you are right now. I love the way you scrunch your nose when you see something new for the first time. I love the way your hair always ends up in knots when you sleep. I love that you insist on wearing ratty boots and that you take your stress out on our ship. I love that you are fiesty and strong-willed, and that you question _everything_ I do just to irk me. But perhaps most of all, more than any of the millions of little things I love about you, I love that you make me feel like I matter. That I am seen, and heard, and loved.”

Ben’s voice cracked as the tears welled up his eyes, blubbering his words as they continued to spill out. “From the moment you broke inside my head and forced me to confront who I was, I knew you were it for me. And every day I’ve spent with you since has only reaffirmed that.  You’ve never needed a name to have a family, Rey. You built your own family from the ground up. You brought _my_ family back together, when all I’d ever done was tear it apart. You are the person I want by my side, who I want to make proud, who I look to when I’m lost. Without you I am nothing. My _name_ means nothing. Only you. Because _you_ are my family Rey.”

Rey’s lips were quivering as thick, heavy tears raced down her cheeks, her small hands twisted up inside his own.

“Ben…”

He shook his head, biting back tears of his own as he swallowed down the thickness building up in his throat.

“I promised you that you weren’t alone. That won’t ever change. Even if you don’t want to marry me, I need you to know that. I need you to know that you have a —“

“Ben.” She cut him off more firmly this time, removing her hands from his vice grip. “Stop.”

His stomach dropped as he looked up from her hands, certain she was going to reject him before he’d even gotten around to saying the most important words. Instead he found her shifting to her knees, reaching out and taking his face in her hands.

“Ben,” She murmured, her big, beautiful eyes taking hold of his like a tractor beam, immobilizing him as she dragged him down into their depths. “Yes.”

He stopped breathing for a moment as she looked down at him, love, and joy, and elation bursting through her like the sea as her face split open into the most brilliant smile he’d ever seen.

“Yes?” He asked in disbelief.

“Yes you nerf herder. Of course yes.”


	2. A Discovery

Two weeks.

Ben had been gone for two weeks. 

She’d let him go to Nar Shaddaa, despite Leia’s protests, for the sole reason that she knew he would go anyway. And at the very least, she didn’t want him hiding it from her. But she’d regretted it almost immediately. 

There had been no comms. No messages or force bond connections. It was as if he’d fallen off the grid completely. The only sign of life was the subtle, yet constant pulse of the string that held them together. At night, when she lay in bed unable to sleep, she would brush lightly against it, feeling the pulsing vibrations as they made their way across the galaxy, not stopping until they found the other side. The gentle pulse that returned to her was his way of reassuring her he was alright. That she shouldn’t worry. That he’d come back to her soon. 

It was little comfort, considering this was the longest that she and Ben had been apart since Bespin. It would be the longest they would ever be apart again if she had anything to say about it. 

Especially now.

She’d noticed something changing in the Force in recent days, like a dim light glowing around her. At first she’d thought nothing of it, assuming it had something to do with the new life that bloomed now that it was once again spring in Naboo’s Lake Country.

But as the days went on the light grew stronger, a presence looming large over her wherever she went. She contemplated if she was feeling the residual effects of whatever it was that Ben was doing, but she quickly nixed that theory. She knew Ben’s signature in the Force better than she knew herself. Whatever this was, it wasn’t their bond. 

The dusty old Jedi texts she pulled off their shelf had been about as helpful as they’d been when she’d tried to rebuild her lightsaber and she knew better than to even bother trying to find an answer on the holonet. And so she did the only other thing she could do: she meditated. 

Every morning she would sit out by the lake and close her eyes, listening to the water as it lapped against the shoreline. She could feel the birds and the fish and the plant life that thrived here, in this breathtaking paradise, and it made her smile. 

In the evening she would do the same, only instead of by the water, she would sit in front of the large fireplace in the lounge of Varykino, basking in the warmth of the flames. 

It was her way of finding balance. Water and fire. Cold and Hot. Light and dark. Life and death. 

Still, she found no answers, only a growing sense of loneliness and frustration. 

Queen Milané noticed her anxiety during their lesson one afternoon, calling it to attention immediately. Rey had flown to Theed for the day, as she did regularly, to continue the girl’s training. They were sitting across from each other in the grass, surrounded by the most beautiful assortment of flowers Rey had ever seen. She’d been teaching Milané how to pick off a single petal with the Force. 

The lesson was going well. Milané was a quick learner and an excellent student. She felt strange being the “master” to a queen, but then, as Rey regularly had to remind herself, she was older than the girl, and even leaders needed guidance. 

Rey watched as the purple petal settled in Milané’s lap and the girl opened her eyes to witness her success.

“Perfect.” Rey smiled. “I don’t even know why you need me.”

Milané’s mouth twisted into her signature shy smile. The girl was lovely, especially in times like these, when her hair was let loose in elaborate brown curls, her face clear of the traditional makeup worn by the monarch of Naboo and her body draped in soft, flowing fabrics. She was young and free and beautiful. Here she could be a teenage girl once again, unburdened by the politics of the galaxy that now sat at her doorstep, allowed for a brief moment to simply be herself. 

“I don’t know what I would do without you Rey.” She replied, rubbing the petal between her fingers. “I’ll admit I was terrified when the Supreme Leader told me of my power that day. I thought he would kill me. But now...” Rey watched as the petal floated out of her hand and gently spun it around in the air above them, Milané’s mouth dropping open as her head tilted back to admire it. “...now I can’t imagine my life without it.”

“I know exactly how you feel.” Rey smiled to herself.

It was true. It seemed like lifetime ago that she’d left Jakku in the Millennium Falcon, riding off into the metaphorical sunset with Finn and discovering something beyond her wildest dreams. In some ways, it had been. The life she lived now was entirely different from the one she’d lived before, as was the woman living it. The ride had been bumpy and brutal, but worth it. Absolutely worth it. 

“Speaking of the Supreme Leader,” Milané looked up knowingly, shifting the conversation in a direction Rey had hoped to avoid, “have you heard from Ben at all?”

Rey sighed heavily. Her time with Milané was something she very much looked forward to. She considered the girl a friend, someone she could confide in and talk to about things she couldn’t talk to Finn or Poe or even Rose about. Her relationship with Ben was one of those things. While the queen’s first interaction with Ben had been less than charmed, she now viewed him in a positive light. She had never fought him in battle, been tortured or lost loved ones at his hand. That made her the only friend Rey had who could look on Ben Solo without also seeing Kylo Ren. 

“No, I haven’t.” She replied sadly, looking down toward the grass and pulling at the blades.

Milané leaned forward, placing a hand on her knee comfortingly. “He’ll be back soon.”

“I hope so.” Rey turned away, trying to hold down her bubbling anxiety. “It’s strange. I was alone for so long. You’d think I’d be used to it.”

She met Milané’s gaze and found comfort in the girl’s smile. “You’re not alone Rey. And you’re more than welcome to stay here until he returns. It gets rather lonely, even with all of these people. It would be nice to have a real friend around.” 

“That would be wonderful.” Rey smiled genuinely, both thrilled and overwhelmed by the offer. She’d stayed at the palace numerous times before, but always under official circumstances. It would be the first time she’d ever be staying with someone as nothing more than a friend. “While we’re at it, maybe you’ll be able to help me identify the strange signature I’ve been feeling in the Force. Normally I would ask Ben, but since he’s gone…”

“What do you mean?”

Rey wasn’t entirely sure how to explain the unidentifiable sensation that had followed her from Varykino, but she couldn’t deny that she was desperate for another opinion on what it could be. She’d expected that coming to Theed would lessen the strength of the pull, thus confirming her theory that it was related to the spring growth that was blooming around their home. She’d been wrong. If anything, the strange signature had strengthened. 

“I can’t explain it, but there is something, I suppose the best word is new, in the Force. Some new signature that is growing everyday. I hadn’t noticed it until the last week or so. I thought it was related to the change of seasons or some new life form in the lake. But it has followed me here. Can you feel it too?”

Milané considered her for a moment. “I can’t say I noticed anything, but I also haven’t been looking, and you are far more attuned to the Force than I am. Perhaps if I focus on it for a moment…” 

“Of course.” Rey nodded as the girl closed her eyes. Rey did the same, reaching out into the abyss. She brushed gently against Ben’s signature. Their bond remained shut, much to her dismay, but she knew he was still there, somewhere in the galaxy, always connected to her. 

“I feel it!” Milané exclaimed suddenly, breaking Rey from her thoughts of Ben. “It’s so bright!”

“Can you sense where it is coming from?”

“Hmmm.” Milané hummed, deep in concentration. “Actually… how interesting. It seems to be coming from you Rey.”

Rey’s eyes snapped open. “What?”

“It’s very light, lighter than your signature is on its own, but it’s wrapped up in yours, almost like it’s attached to you somehow.”

Rey blinked rapidly before slamming her own eyes closed and reaching back out, feeling for the signature herself. She found it immediately, a light so bright it almost glowed. As she reached out she felt the strange signature reach back and her stomach lurched, the need to throw up consuming her. 

She’d flung herself away from the Queen as quickly as she could, but there was no avoiding the embarrassment of relieving herself of the incredible lunch they’d consumed all over a bush of white flowers. 

“Rey…” Milané had approached cautiously, rubbing her back as she gently pulled Rey’s hair behind her shoulders. “I think I may know what’s going on.”

Milané insisted she remain in Theed until Ben returned after that, making sure her every need was met and sending in medical droid after medical droid to tend to her. They all told her the same thing, but in truth she hadn’t needed them to. The moment the beautiful bright light had reached out and brushed against her she’d known exactly what it was. 

Rey was pregnant. 

Now she stood on the balcony at Varykino, anxiously awaiting the return of the man she loved, unsure what to expect from him. They’d never talked about having children. She wasn’t sure it was something he’d ever even considered. It certainly wasn’t something she’d thought about. Would he be angry with her? Or upset or worried or unsure?

She felt him the moment his ship exited hyperspace above Naboo and returned home immediately, assuring Milané that she would be alright. He’d landed outside the villa not long after she returned and immediately made his way through the villa toward her.  

She starred out at the beautiful lake around her as her hand brushed absentmindedly against her stomach. It was too early for a bump to be noticeable, but she found that she couldn’t help herself. Her body had started to fill out as soon as she stopped having to worry about where her next meal would come from, but it didn’t stop her from noticing the subtle changes. The baby’s signature grew brighter the closer Ben came and Rey wondered if the baby could sense its father approaching just as she could. 

“Rey.” 

The sound of his voice was like velvet on her ears, so deep and dark and soothing. Her stomach still did somersaults whenever he whispered in her ear, his deep voice stirring dangerous thoughts without fail. It was little wonder she was in her current condition. Part of her wondered how it hadn’t happened sooner. 

She turned to face him and saw him standing across the balcony, looking on her as if for the first time, his shoulders dropping and his chest relaxing with a deep sigh of relief. 

“Ben.” She smiled, before running and leaping into his arms. He wrapped her against him and squeezed gently, lifting her feet off the ground and spinning her around. 

“I missed you.” He whispered against her neck, trailing innocent kisses from her jaw bone to her shoulder.

“I missed you too.” She replied, pulling back to lean her forehead against his. “You’re not allowed to be gone that long again. Not without me.”

His lips curved up into the smirk she loved so much. “Is that an order?”

“Yes.” She insisted stubbornly. “And if anyone puts up a fight, you can tell them that as a Jedi Master I outrank them all.”

Ben lifted his brow in amusement. “Ah, I see how it is. I leave for a few weeks and my wife decides to run off and become a Jedi Master behind my back.” He brushed his nose against hers as he teased her. “I suppose you have to kill me now, what with my darkness threatening to destroy all you hold dear.”

“Maybe.” Rey shrugged in his arms, putting on an air of mock indifference. “Or maybe I could persuade you to see the light.”

“Oh?” Ben leaned forward, drawing dangerously close as his mouth curved into a full smile. “And how would you do that?”

Heat shot threw her core at the gentle, tentative caress of his lips against hers, but she pulled back as he leaned forward, prolonging the tortuous teasing yet again. 

“I’d start by forcing you to repress your more... passionate desires.” 

“I thought you liked my passionate desires.” He was leaning in toward her still, a mischievous smile teasing at his mouth as his eyes scoured her lips.

“That was the old Rey. Jedi Master Rey feels otherwise.”

Ben’s chest rumbled with gentle laughter as he kissed her forehead and set her back down on the ground. She regained her footing, but he did not let her escape his arms. 

“Well Jedi Master Rey,  if you’re going to demand that I repress my passionate urges, then I’m afraid I’ll have to demand that you stop being so beautiful” The half smirk that he’d inherited from his father reached up to his milky brown eyes as he lifted his hand to brush her hair behind her ear, and she found herself unable to resist any longer. Reaching up to run her hands through his soft, dark waves, she dragged him down, crushing her lips against his. He wrapped his arms around her lower back and pulled her in impossibly closer, meeting her desperation with his own. 

It wasn’t until Ben’s hands drifted down below her hips that she pulled away, biting her lower lip as she nervously met his gaze. His eyes were blown wide with a burning desire that pulsated off of him through the bond. Under normal circumstances, she would not have been willing or able to resist his fiery gaze. But these were not normal circumstances. She needed to tell him their news, and she needed to do it before he noticed the changes himself and ruined her surprise. 

“Ben…” She whispered, stepping away from him slightly. “I discovered something while you were away.”

Ben’s brow furrowed, sensing the change in her tone as he came down from the highs of their passionate embrace. “What do you mean? Is everything alright?”

“Yes.” Rey nodded hesitantly. “At least, I think so.”

Ben’s face grew more serious as he gazed upon her. “Should I be worried?”

“No!” She replied in earnest. “Well, maybe. Probably actually. But not in the way you think.”

“That does  _ not  _ make me feel better.”

She laughed nervously, twisting her hands together in front of her. She had been terrified when she’d learned the truth. The prospect of raising a child was harrowing. But the moment she recognized the magnificent glow as her own flesh and blood, she knew it didn’t matter. This baby was part of her, a part of both of them. She could only hope he would feel the same.

“You’re nervous.”

“No, I.. well. Maybe.” She hesitated for a moment, trying to formulate the best way to spit out the words. “I noticed a change in the Force, not long after you left. I wasn’t sure what it was at first. I meditated on it for days with no luck. Milané was the one who finally figured it out.”

She watched as Ben grew tense before her. “What was it?”

“Well, actually it’s not a  _ was _ but an  _ is _ . It’s still there. Can you… can you feel it?”

His brow furrowed even further as he looked at her for a moment and then finally closed his eyes. It didn’t take long before he found what he was looking for, the change in his expression instantly recognizable.

“I… It’s so light… and it’s… Rey.... Wh-what is it?”

She stepped forward, her hand resting gently on her stomach once again, took in a deep breath and finally let the words fall away. 

“It’s a baby Ben.”

His eyes shot wide so fast she would have laughed. The shocked expression on his face stopped her. 

“A baby?” He whispered the words, so low she could barely hear him. His body stood frozen and his eyes were glazed over as if he was in a trance.

The earlier giddiness was wiped away as she looked at him, shame and despair seeping in as tears formed in her eyes. “I’m sorry.” She muttered. “I know we never talked about children. I should’ve thought about this a long time ago. You don’t have to…”

“Rey.” He cut her off, his voice returning to its normal volume and his eyes meeting hers with wide-eyed wonder. He stepped forward and cupped her face in his hands as the widest smile she’d ever seen lit up his face, scaring away all of her fears in one fell swoop. “We’re having a baby?”

She gasped out a laugh and nodded against his hands, tears flowing freely down her face. “Yeah, Ben.” She smiled, “We’re having a baby.”

His lips were on hers in an instant as they both laughed through their tear soaked kisses. Eventually he pulled away, resting his forehead against hers and gazing lovingly into her eyes.

“I love you.” He declared, his eyes red with tears. “I love you and I’m never leaving your side again, the galaxy be damned.”

Rey laughed as she pulled him close, her head falling comfortably against his chest as his hands wrapped her up in his protective embrace. 

Ben ran his fingers through her loose waves and pressed kisses against her temple as she soaked up his joy and love and contentment. His shields were down completely, leaving all of his emotions bare to her. It was his passion and adulation were overwhelming, and the tears returned immediately. She leaned back, meeting his gaze for a brief moment before she pulled herself up on her toes and kissed him, dropping her walls away and projecting her love and devotion through every avenue she could. 

They stood there, drowning in each others adoration until another Force signature reached out and pressed against them both. It was comparatively dim, but it was glowing brighter with each passing day, reminding her that all of their sacrifices had led them here, to this beautiful place, and the dawn of a new adventure: A family of their own. 


	3. A Fear

Rey was fast asleep beside him, her chest rising and falling slowly, marking a peaceful nights rest. She was sleeping more lately, which he’d learned from his research was normal at this stage, but she woke often in the night, be it from dreams or from their daughter’s sudden flailing within her. 

Tonight, however, both of his beloved girls were resting peacefully. 

He, on the other hand, was not. 

Taking a final glance at his sleeping wife, Ben quietly slipped from their bed, moving to settle the covers over her before turning toward the balcony outside their bedroom. The doors to their balcony were left open this time of year, the calming breeze cooling the space. Rey liked the sounds of the birds chirping in the morning, and the soothing sound of water lapping against the shore line. 

He liked that he could sneak out soundlessly in the middle of the night without her noticing and attempt to calm himself down. 

In all his life, he could not remember ever experiencing more joy than he had the moment Rey told him she was pregnant. They hadn’t been trying. In truth, he hadn’t even considered it a possibility (which, in retrospect, was incredibly foolish of him). But as soon as he reached out and felt the glorious bright light that was their daughter growing within her, he knew that his whole life was about to be changed for the better. 

Ben had thrown himself headlong into preparation, spending hours upon hours reading up on pregnancy and parenting. He’d started a garden full of fruits that the Naboo claimed would build a child’s immune system. He’d purchased a midwife droid to keep track of Rey’s progress and to be there for the birth. He spent a delightful afternoon with Rey painting the nursery, and then three subsequent days struggling to build the elaborate cradle his mother had sent them - much to his wife’s amusement. 

He spoiled Rey rotten, to the point where she actually sat him down a few weeks in and told him to stop. 

“Ben, I’m pregnant, not amputated. I’m capable of carrying things on my own.” 

That had deterred him for all of about one cycle.  

He cooked for her whenever she was hungry - which was often - making sure she balanced her craving for sweets and pies with food of actual substance. He sat by the lake with her each morning, braiding flowers into her hair while she meditated on their baby’s signature, watching it grow and change over time. In the evening they’d sit by the fire and he’d massage her aching muscles, listening to her complain about her swollen feet or her sore back. And at night he’d hold her, his arms protectively draped over the two people that mattered most to him in the whole galaxy, soaking in the beautiful signature that emanated from within her womb, memorizing every detail. 

The days were still filled with decisions, meetings, and trips to Theed, but he’d made it abundantly clear that he would not be away from his wife for more than a few hours at a time. If they were needed off-world, she was by his side. 

Perhaps it was not an ideal situation, to have the leader of the galaxy playing house in a remote part of a mid-rim planet, but he didn’t care. He could make the necessary decisions from there, he had the people in place to execute those decisions where he needed them, and he had his mother to worry about the rest. 

It was  _ his _ duty to be there for Rey. To make her pregnancy as easy as he possibly could for as long as he could, and to make sure she felt loved and cared for. She didn’t need to worry about anything but herself and the baby. Least of all him. 

But in these quiet moments, when he stood outside and looked up at the three moons that lit up Naboo’s night sky, he was no longer able to hide his fear away. 

A man like him had no business being a father. 

Simply being allowed to love Rey was far beyond anything he deserved. And while she’d somehow found a way to forgive him for the terrible things he’d done, he couldn’t ask that of the little girl he already loved beyond compare. She would need him to be her protector, her teacher, her rock. He could never be those things for her if she knew the truth. It would destroy her trust in him. 

He could try and hide it from her, as he so badly wanted to do, but then, if she somehow found out in another other way… well… he knew intimately just how painful that betrayal could be. 

Begrudgingly, he found himself sympathizing with his parent’s decision not to tell him the truth about Vader. If a conversation about who his  _ grandfather _ was had been too difficult for his parents, the idea of someday having to tell his daughter that  _ he  _ was the monster that plagued the nightmares of life forms across the galaxy was suffocating. 

And that was only one of the thousands of ways he knew he could fail her. Their daughter did not even have a name, and yet he could already envision her disappointment and hatred, his own self-loathing all-consuming knowing he’d brought that pain upon her. 

His hands gripped the railing to the point of numbness as he closed his eyes and swallowed hard, reaching out for a peace that seemed so far out of his grasp. 

“Ben?” 

Ben’s eyes shot open as he turned at the sound of Rey’s voice, thick from sleepy disuse. She stood midway between their bed and the balcony, donning one of his old tunics. Where his shirts once draped her like a loose dress, the swell of her belly had inched the shirt ever higher so that now it barely covered the top of her legs. He couldn’t help but grin slightly at the sight. Rey was beautiful no matter what she wore, but he had to admit this look was his favorite. 

“I’m sorry.” He murmured, kissing her hair as she came to stand beside him. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

She did not respond, instead raising her hand and gently caressing his cheek, her brow furrowing in concern. “What is it?”

“It’s nothing.” He shook his head, taking her hand from his face and squeezing it in his own.

He pulled her in, her back resting against his chest as he cradled her belly in his hands. “How is she?”

“Uncharacteristically calm.” Rey chuckled lightly, covering his hands with her own. “Unlike her father.”

He didn’t respond to her jab. He already felt better. Rey’s presence always calmed him. He didn’t need to plague her with his worries now. 

“I know you haven’t been sleeping Ben.” she turned to face him again, refusing to let him get away with it. “Please talk to me.” 

He sighed heavily. “I don’t want to put this on you.”

She scoffed and crossed her arms. “Ben Solo, you are going to tell me what it is that’s bothering you, or so help me I will dig through your mind and find out for myself.”

He had no doubts that she would, and so he sagged back against railing, his head falling back as he breathed out deeply, trying to formulate the best way to begin. 

“What if…” He started, his voice dropping low. “What if I’m not meant to be a father?”

“What!?” She gawked at him.

He looked down, unable to meet her eyes as his guilt and pain bubbled up within him. “I don’t want to hurt her Rey. I… I can’t bare it.”

“Ben, what are you talking about?” Rey moved to stand beside him, brushing her hand along his arm. 

“Think about it Rey. You’ve forgiven me, somehow, for the monstrous things I’ve done. But the rest of the galaxy won’t forget who Kylo Ren is, what he’s done.  And while I know I’d never intentionally cause her pain, I hurt her just by being who I am. I can’t erase the terrible things that I’ve done. I can’t change the way she will be seen. I can’t take away the legacy that inevitably passes down to her. That legacy nearly destroyed me Rey. How can I put that on her?” 

Tears began to trail down his face as he struggled through the words, turning away so that she could not see him.

“Ben, look at me.” She pulled herself around and held his face between her hands, forcing his chin up. His eyes did not follow. “I’m scared too. Terrified actually. I have no idea what being a parent even looks like, much less how to be a good one. But that doesn’t matter. You know why?”

His eyes lifted slightly to meet hers, silently beckoning her to continue.

“Because she’s  _ ours _ Ben. We made her. You and me. Two broken, abandoned people who came together despite everything and created her. And she’s not going to be like us, Ben. We won’t abandon her. We’re going to love her, and we’re going to take care of her, and we are going to figure it out as we go.”

The sob he’d been trying to hold back escaped him as he gasped in denial. “But how do I live with myself knowing that she’ll have to bare the burden of my mistakes? She’ll just be the spawn of Kylo Ren.”

“ _ And _ the last Jedi.” Rey reminded him, feigning offense as she brushed away a stray tear from his cheek.

He sighed, leaning into her hand. “What will I tell her?”

“The truth.” Rey replied determinedly, her hand trailing up and brushing through his hair. “You tell her the truth. And then you show her the man you are today, and you let her decide for herself who her father truly is.”

Ben gazed upon Rey through tear filled eyes, his adoration of her beyond any words he could string together in his most articulate moments. Her hands slipped slowly from his hair and drifted down until they had hold of his. She squeezed gently and then lifted them up to place them tenderly against her belly. 

“She loves you Ben. I feel it every time she hears your voice, or feels your touch on my skin.” She looked down at his hands on her and smiled. “And I love you. Your past matters only because it brought you to the present. And as far as I’m concerned, the present is pretty damn great.” 

She gasped as he pulled her against him, burying his face against her neck and holding her as close as he could given the swell of life resting between them. “I don’t deserve you.” He murmured against her, squeezing tighter as she held him close. 

“Probably not.” She teased, pulling her head back and smirking at him. “But I don’t really care.” 

Her lips found his, brushing gently against them as she hummed in contentment. When she pulled away moments later to rest her forehead against his, her eyes glimmered with tenderness. 

Leaning away from her briefly, he ushered her to stand in front of him yet again, wrapping his arms around her waist and pressing his chin to the top of her head. It was the only way he could hold her close in her current state, and he found that it had the potential to stir up a variety of emotions, depending on the mood. Tonight, he simply felt grateful. 

They stood there for a long time, looking up at the three moons that lit up Naboo’s night sky, Rey resting against him as he held her close. 

She was right, per usual. There was nothing he could do to change his past. He could only move forward, using the power he’d taken in unsavory ways and using it to build a better galaxy. A galaxy their daughter would be proud of. 

And then he would tell her the truth. 

She deserved to hear it from him. He  _ wanted _ her to hear it from him. And so, when the time came, many years from now he hoped, he would sit with her and tell her who he’d been. He could only hope that the man he was now would be good enough to overcome the rest. 

“You know,” Rey murmured, leaning her head back against him, “We still haven’t decided on a name.”

“We have not.” He agreed, nodding against her ear. 

“I came up with one. I wasn’t sure about it at first, but standing out here tonight, I’ve decided that I think it’s perfect.” 

“Have you now?” He kissed her shoulder and pulled her in tighter. “Do I get any say in the matter?”

“Of course you do.” She threw her hips back into him and turned as much as he would allow given his tight grip on her midsection. “But I think you’ll like it too. At least... I hope so.” 

He pressed a kiss against her head and let her relax back into him. “What is it?”

“So, you know how Naboo’s moons are different sizes and colors?”

He nodded. “Of course.”

“And you know how I always say that the giant red one reminds me of you, and the smaller blue one is me, and that the little gray one in the middle is this one right here.” She gestured to her belly, rubbing her hands over it soothingly. 

“Yes…”

“And you also know how we both agreed that we want her name to be her own, without any strings or legacies attached.”

“Yes Rey. What are you getting at?”

“Well…” He could sense her nerves building within her as his anticipation grew. “What about…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright friends. I need your theories. What is her name going to be?


	4. A Granddaughter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter ended up being more emotional than was originally intended, but we do get the name reveal, as well as lots of daddy Ben time :)

“Luna!” Ben cried, chasing after the little girl as she ran down the beach toward the water. “Sweetheart, don’t go in there without me!”

Rey could only smile as she watched from the balcony above, her baby girl turning back with a wobble, laughing at her father and then continuing her stubborn path down toward the lake. She would’ve made it too, had she not lifted suddenly into the air, shrieking with delight as she floated into her father’s waiting arms.

“And just where do you think you’re going?” He teased, tickling her belly as she squirmed against him.

“Up!” She screamed between fits of laughter. “Up! Up!”

Ben lifted her up above him then, throwing her into the air as she cried out joyfully. Instead of falling back into his waiting hands, she remained hovering just above him, close enough for comfort, yet far enough to give her the sensation of independent flight.

“Luke used to do that with him.” The familiar rasp of Leia Organa sounded behind her as her mother-in-law joined her at the balconies edge. “He loved it. He’d beg Han to ‘make him fly’ all the time. I think it was the only time Han ever wished he had the Force.” She chuckled sadly at the memory. “Instead he just took him out in a real ship. Let him fly the damn things when he was barely tall enough to see over the controls.”

Rey’s eyes remained glued to her husband and daughter as she smirked at the thought of young Ben sitting in the pilots seat she so often occupied herself. “If I’m not careful, Ben will be letting her do both before we know it.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that.” Leia teased, both of them smiling as Luna floated back down to her father and threw her little arms tightly around his neck. “That little girl may have him wrapped around her finger, but he would never risk her safety, no matter how much she begs him.”

That much was true. Try as he might to give their baby girl the freedom to explore the world on her own, he was always watching her like a hawk, ready to jump into action at a second's notice. She was positive the man had slept with one eye and two ears open since Luna began walking, particularly after she slipped her crib and wandered into their room in the middle of the night, making it all the way to the balcony edge before he’d caught her.

Ben carried the squealing toddler over to the water’s edge and sat down with her, dangling her just above the water and then dropping her feet in, only to lift her back up immediately, eliciting more infectious laughter.

There was perhaps nothing Rey loved more than the sound of their daughters laughter. It was her favorite sound, just as it was her favorite sight to see her little brown haired bundle of energy wrapped up in her husband’s arms, playing joyfully beside the lake.

“I never thought I’d get to see this.” Leia murmured, her voice cracking and pulling Rey’s gaze her way. She was crying, the tears falling freely down her cheeks as her lips pulled up into a wide smile. “He’s so happy.”

Rey turned to look back out at them and nodded, smiling wistfully. “Yes, I think he is.”

Leia reached out and grabbed hold of her hand then, squeezing it gently. “I’ll never be able to thank you enough for this.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Rey replied, returning the squeeze lightly. “This is as much your doing as it is anyone’s.”

Leia shook her head. “No, Rey. You saved him. You gave him love and trust and a family. You did that.” She chuckled darkly before adding, “All I did was birth him, and then I screwed up the rest.”

They both turned at the sound of Ben’s laughter mixing with Luna’s. He was crouched down beside her as she clapped her hands against the water, spraying her father in the face as he shook his long locks at her like a wet dog.

Rey’s heart seized in her chest, as it did every time she watched him with their daughter.

He was brilliant with her. Everything a father should be: present, attentive, loving. She couldn’t even be jealous of the connection they shared. It was too right. Too beautiful. Luna moved around him like he was the sun, drawn in by his gravity and constantly in his orbit.

He was her everything, and she was his.

Ben knew this. But it didn’t stop him from falling into despair at the thought that she would one day grow up to feel differently. Rey had fought with him on it, unable to understand his fears. Not every child looked up to their parent’s the way Luna did, she was sure of it.

But Ben had.

After an excessive amount of coercion, he’d given in one night and showed her his earliest memories of his mother. She’d cried watching a beautiful, regal, young Leia Organa play with her son, letting him unbraid her hair and showering him with affection. He looked at Leia as if she was air itself, the life force to which he was tied, inexplicably constant and his. And Han. Han was his hero. He’d followed his father around like a magnetic force, begging for his attention and praise. He’d wanted to be just like him once.

He hadn’t needed to show her what changed as he grew up. She knew the rest of story all too well.

She had little by way of comforting words after that night, with her own fear beginning to fester at the thought that they might lose her one day. Yet she knew, deep down that his fate would not befall their daughter. She couldn’t promise that Luna would always look at him like the stars shone out his ass. She couldn’t promise that she’d never be mad at him, or that he’d never let her down in some way. But what she could offer, what she could give with absolute certainty, was the knowledge that they would always feel that way about her. No matter what she did, or how she felt, they would never stop loving her.

Just like Han and Leia never stopped loving Ben.

“That’s not true.” Rey shook her head, turning to face her beloved mother-in-law. “You gave him the most important gift of all.”

Leia looked up at her skeptically. “And what is that, my dear?”

“Forgiveness.”

It was immediately clear that Leia was not expecting this answer. She swallowed hard, tears welling up in the corner of her eyes as Rey continued.

“Of all the damage he caused, the people he hurt, there was no one he harmed more completely than you. There was no one he betrayed more deeply. Yet you forgave him anyway. You _love_ him anyway.” She reached out, taking Leia’s hands in hers. “He’ll never acknowledge it, but I know. The way he loves me, the way he loves Luna; That is a direct reflection of the unconditional love you’ve given him.”

Rey looked back out at Ben and Luna, still splashing around in the lake, a knot forming in her stomach. “So really, I should be thanking you.” She turned back and smiled as best she could, fighting back her own tears as Leia’s continued to fall. “You welcomed me into your family, in every sense of the word. You trusted me with those who mattered most to you, and you showed me love and support when I’d never known it before. I will _never_ be able to thank you enough for that.”

Rey wasn’t sure who reached out first, but a moment later she had her arms wrapped tightly around Leia, laughing through their shared tears.

“Oh Rey.” Leia sighed, shaking her head against Rey’s chest.

 _Is everything alright?_ Ben questioned through the bond, having sensed the sudden change in his wife and mother.

She rested her head against Leia’s and looked back down to find him looking up at them, his brow furrowed with concern.

 _Yes_ . She smiled reassuringly, squeezing Leia tighter. _Everything is perfect_.

__________________________________

Dinner that night was an understated affair. Ben had compiled a delightful assortment of fresh fruits from the garden and tender meats from their last trip into town. She never grew tired of letting him cook for her, and even though she’d tried to learn in the years since they’d made Varykino their home, there was no competition for who was master of their kitchen. Rey salivated just looking at the table, the smell alone enough to tempt her to the dark side.

“Well if I’d known it was that easy...” Ben teased, sneaking up behind her and planting a kiss on her shoulder, wrapping his spare arm around her waist as he set down yet another dish.

She hummed in contentment, turning to wrap her arms around her husband’s neck. “It wouldn’t have been _thaaat_ easy.” She teased, biting at his lower lip playfully.

“Careful now.” He pulled back, holding her hips at a distance. “We wouldn’t want to spoil your dinner.”

“Are you sure about that?” She smiled, her eyes trained on his soft, luscious lips. “I, for one, have always been a strong believer in enjoying dessert first.”

“What a terrible influence you are.” Ben smiled and leaned down to capture her lips, tightening his hold on her lower back as he moved her backward toward the table. She lost herself in the sweet ecstasy of his mouth, only to be torn away by the sound of a throat clearing from across the room.

Rey leaned away to find Leia standing in the entryway, Luna perched comfortably at her hip. The little girl's face was lit up with a bright smile, her tiny hands clapping together giddily. 

All three adults in the room burst out laughing as Ben released her to flit across the room, grabbing Luna from Leia’s outstretched arms and kissing all over her face.

“Come here lovebug. It’s your turn.” Rey nuzzled her daughter’s cheek as Luna laughed and squealed, letting her mother shower her with affection as she swept her over to her place at the table.

Leia shook her head fondly, settling into the seat Ben pulled out for her. “Keep that up and you’ll have another little one on the way in no time.”

Ben looked up between Luna and Rey, smiling as his gaze met hers. “That might not be so bad.”

“Hey now.” Rey laughed as she sat down in her own chair, immediately reaching for a pear to slice up for Luna. “Are you planning on carrying the next one?”

“Touché” His eyes lit up behind his close mouthed smile, meeting her gaze with unspoken promises of finishing what they’d started. Then he turned his attention back to the delightful spread of food and began serving the various meats.

The dinner was delicious, the conversation casual, and Luna found a way to keep the whole affair lively with her occasional squawks when the attention drifted away from her. She quickly developed a habit of throwing her food at her father across the table. They turned it into a game, with Luna throwing food and her parents catching it with the force, floating it all back to her plate, and on one occasion, even lapping it against her face. The glare Rey shot her husband only spurred him on, as Luna just laughed and laughed at her new favorite dinner time activity.

After dinner Rey took Luna to get ready for bed, leaving mother and son to clear the table. Ben usually insisted they bathe Luna together, and he always made sure to read her a bedtime story to soothe her into her slumber. But tonight bedtime was to be a quick endeavour, what with Luna practically falling asleep at the dinner table before they’d even dug into the dessert. And Rey wanted to make sure that her husband and mother-in-law had some time to themselves.

Leia and Ben had done much to repair their relationship in the years since they’d reunited. His mother managed the political machine that was the new Galactic Order, allowing him to spend most of his time here with his family. She still made time to come visit them as often as she could, but she made a conscious effort to keep politics and business out of her visits as much as was possible, focusing on spending time as a family. There were tense moments, the unspoken truth that someone was missing from the table hanging heavy over all of them. But over time Rey’d watched Ben soften, and he began to look forward to his mother’s visits more and more.

With their daughter down for the night, Rey made her way toward the kitchen, the sounds of dishes clanking trailing upstairs. She was on the last step when her heart clenched and the sounds stopped. But it wasn’t her own emotions that had shifted so quickly. It was Ben.

Leia was caressing Ben’s arm as she entered the kitchen, murmuring something as he shook his head in denial.

“Ben?” Rey’s voice trailed off as Leia looked up at her sadly. Ben just looked away, pushing off the counter and exiting the room in a flash. Rey’s stomach dropped as she watched Ben storm out of the room. “Leia, what’s going on?”

“Come here Rey.” Leia took hold of both her hands and squeezed. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

____________________________________

She found him outside, standing beside the lake, his hands clenched at his side. His emotions were a swirl of misery, despair, and loss, a mirror image of her own.

She approached cautiously, reaching out in the force to let him know she was there. He said nothing when she finally reached his side, wrapping herself around his arm and dropping her forehead to his shoulder. They stood there in silence for a long time, listening as the waves lapped against the beach.

“It’s my fault.” He murmured finally, almost inaudible in the silence of the night. “It’s my fault this happened.”

“Ben, no.” She pulled him tighter. “It’s not.”

“It is. You know it is.” He was stern, but his voice was heavy, loaded with emotion and dripping with unshed tears. “It was my men that shot her out of that bridge. My men, on my orders. And I did nothing to stop it.”

“But she survived, Ben. She survived, and she’s here and…”

“And now she’s dying.” He pulled out of her grip and turned away, his chest heaving in the darkness. “She’s dying and there’s nothing I can do to…”

His body wracked as the sobs finally fell away, killing the rest of the sentence on the spot. Rey moved instinctually, wrapping her arms around him and pressing her head against his back.

“I… I can’t… I don’t…”

“Shhh.” She soothed, trying to quell her own tears as they soaked through the back of his shirt. “She’s not going anywhere. Not yet.”

His chest heaved as he wrapped his hands around hers in a vice grip. “I just… I thought we’d have more time. I wanted Luna to have more time…”

Rey nodded against his back, pulling him closer.  “Then we’ll give them more time.”

Ben stiffened, turning around to face her questioningly.

She took both his hands, gripping them tightly as Leia always did. “Ben, I want to ask her to stay.”

Ben just stared at her, his face blank as she looked up at him pleadingly.

“I know how important she is to the Galactic Order. And I know that you’re able to be here, with us, because of everything she does. But we can find someone else. If she’s here with Luna than we can do more - “

“Yes.” He cut her off before she could finish her proposal.

“Yes, you want her to stay? Or yes we can find someone?”

“I want her to stay.”

Rey stared up at her heartbroken husband, her heart clenching tightly at the look of utter devastation in his eyes. “Okay.” She nodded. “Okay. So, we ask her? Tomorrow?”

“Yes.” He nodded, pulling her in tight against his chest.

“Okay.” She murmured, soaking in his warmth and hiding herself in his embrace as the sadness coursed through them both. “Okay.”

_____________________________________

Rey found her out on the terrace the next morning, sipping a steaming cup of caf and staring out at the turquoise water. She turned as she heard Rey approach, but Rey was certain Leia had felt her coming the moment she’d slipped out of bed.

“I’m glad you decided to settle here.” Leia said, bringing her lips up to the edge of the mug. “It would be a real shame if this much beauty went unappreciated.”

Rey nodded in agreement, running her hands along the railings edge as she looked out at the water below. Leia was right. There was so much beauty here. Beauty she never could’ve dreamed of as an desert rat on Jakku. She could appreciate the lush green grass, and the calm blue water. She would marvel at the every changing flowers and the ivy vines that twisted and curved along the chateau for the rest of her life. It was all new. And even when the flowers died each winter, they were reborn again, more vibrant and beautiful than before. It was a promise, bestowed upon all living creatures by the Force. Life was a cycle. The promise of the end was ever-present, an inevitable and necessary part of life.

Knowing that didn’t make the prospect of losing the ones you love any easier, though.

Leia turned to her, her eyes soft and gentle. “How are you?”

Rey let out a weak laugh. “Better than you I suppose.”

Leia chuckled. “Yes, well, I would certainly hope so.”

They stood there silently for a moment, Rey unable to crack even the barest hint of a smile at Leia’s attempt to lighten the mood. She noticed, of course, and Rey felt her shift accordingly.

“How is he?”

Rey sighed, closing her eyes to hold back her tears.

“He’s…”

The truth was that Ben was heartbroken. He hadn’t slept a wink the night before Neither of them had. He’d cradled her in his arms, rocking them gently as they held on tight; unwilling, or perhaps unable, to bare the thought of letting the other go.

Leia understood, nodding solemnly at the unfinished words that hung in the air between them.

“It’s not his fault.”

“No, it’s not.”

“But he’ll blame himself anyway.”

“Of course he will.”

Leia sighed fondly, shaking her head.

“He’s always been this way, you know. Always blaming himself. If Han left, somehow it was his fault. If we fought, it was because of him. He was utterly convinced that we would’ve been better off without him.” She looked down at the wedding ring she still wore, brushing it absentmindedly. “I know now that it was Snoke twisting it all up in his mind, but even with him gone, the damage is done. I’m not sure he’ll ever be totally free from it.”

Leia stared off wistfully, her eyes flickering as old memories played out in her mind. She grew solemn before Rey’s eyes, sadness and regret pouring out of her so acutely that Rey wanted to cry.

“Leia…” Rey said softly, taking the woman’s hand in her own, hoping to draw her out of her misery.

The woman turned to meet her gaze, “Yes dear?”

Rey swallowed hard, looking into the beautiful brown eyes that her husband had inherited from his mother with determination. “Would you stay here? With us?”

Leia knit her brows as she took in Rey’s words. “I’m not sure I understand…”

“Ben and I talked last night.” Rey rushed on, “And we want you to stay. To live here, with us.”

For perhaps the first time since Rey had known Leia Organa, she looked utterly dumbstruck, her mouth dropping open in surprise. “But.. I… What about...”

“We’ll figure it out.” Rey replied with a shrug. “We were going to have to eventually anyway.”

“And Ben…” Leia looked unconvinced, “Is okay with this?”

“ _Yes_.” Rey nodded firmly. “He wants you to be here. He wants Luna to have as much time with you as possible.” She smiled softly, taking Leia’s hands and forcing her to meet her eyes. “You don’t have to decide right now. But please think about it. We want you here. For as long as we can have you.”

“Na na!” Luna’s little wind chime voice called out from across the patio as Ben stepped out with the chateau with Luna in tow, his timing impeccable as always.

“Yes, Nana’s right there.” He answered her, pressing a kiss to the girl’s temple as Rey and Leia turned to greet them with a smile.

“Na na! Na na!” Luna squirmed in her father’s arms, reaching out towards Leia with all the strength she could muster, demanding her father put her down.

“Alright, alright.” Ben chuckled, bending down to set Luna free on the ground. “Go get her.”

Leia bent as the girl clumsily waddled her way into her outstretched arms, pulling her in tight as she lifted her into a tight embrace. Ben followed closely behind, his eyes trained on the little girl as she cooed over Leia’s over-sized necklace.

The quiet tension sat in the air as Rey reached out to take Ben’s hand, squeezing gently. While his face was a mask of serenity, inside he was churning, their daughter the only thing keeping him from burrowing down into his despair.

Luna seemed to sense this, her little face caving into a frown. She reached up, placing both of her tiny hands on her grandmother’s cheeks, holding her gaze determinedly.

“Na na.” She said with as much firmness as a fourteen month old was capable.

“Yes baby girl?” Leia answered, her voice hoarse.

“Na na go?” Luna repeated, looking back to her parents before flopping her hands down on Leia’s shoulders firmly.

Leia choked out a pained sob, brushing her fingers through Luna’s dark curls. “Would it be okay if I didn’t go Luna? Would it be okay if I stayed here with you?”

Luna nodded furiously, reaching for the end of Leia’s long braid. “No go Na na. No go”

Leia looked up to Ben then, their eyes meeting with a thousand silent questions, the Force shifting perceptively around them. Even without the bond she would’ve known what the expression on her husband’s face meant, the all too familiar way his eyes softened with restrained desperation as the word passed silently between them all.

_Please._

Leia’s lips curved, her love enveloping them all in a brightness that Rey recognized as the unconditional love only a parent was capable of expressing. Then she turned back to Luna, kissing her forehead firmly, and squeezing the tiny hand that was still pressed to her cheek.

“Never sweetheart.” Leia’s promised, not just to the little girl in her arms, but to them all. “I’ll never leave you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more to go... Any Scales of Fate readers have a wild guess as to what scene we may see? Hint: There is still one dream that's yet to come true.


	5. A Princess, A General, A Friend

For a woman whose life had been anything but, Leia Organa’s last day was ironically ordinary.

Her decline was steady, her bold, bright force signature dimming ever so slightly with each passing day. Despite this, or perhaps in spite of it, Leia never once showed any outward signs of pain or discomfort.

She woke early every morning to take her cup of caf outside by the lake, watching as the sun rose slowly over the mountains. It was Leia who rescued Luna from her room at the break of dawn, exercising her executive power over when their jumping, giggling alarm clock was allowed to wake her parents up with barely restrained amusement.

On her last day, though, that alarm clock never came. Ben found his mother and daughter sitting by the lake. Leia was twisting Luna’s dark curls into an elaborate braid while his four-year old practiced on her own doll, gabbing away contently.

It was a picture perfect scene, one he’d woken to many times over the last few years. Yet there was something different in the air that morning. There was a heaviness surrounding his mother, a weight that accompanied an unexpected spike of bright light pulsing through her.

“Ben?”

Rey came up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist and kissing his shoulder blade gently.

“Rey…” He started, his voice breaking as realization broke over him. “Do you…?”

“I feel it too.” She replied quietly, knowing there was little else to say.  

None of them worked that day, hiding away every data pad or commlink in favor of a day spent playing in the lake and dancing around the kitchen while all four of them prepared dinner together. In the evening they took a sunset flight over the waterfalls, letting Luna think she was steering the ship as she sat contently in her father’s lap. Leia sat in the co-pilot seat beside them, soaking in the beauty of her mother’s home world one last time.

It was a beautiful day. A happy day. One that couldn't have been more perfect if he'd planned it for weeks. 

Leia stayed behind to read to Luna at bedtime that night. It took everything Ben had not to break at her silent plea for a final moment with her granddaughter, and Rey lugged him out of the room, both of them falling back against the wall they listened through the cracked door.

“Nana?” Luna’s little voice so bright as she sat bundled in blankets beside her grandmother, holding tightly to her loth-cat plush toy.

“Yes my love?”

“You are going now, aren’t you?”

There was a beat of silence.

“Yes, my Moonlight. I am.”

“Are you going to see Papa Han and Unca Luke?”

Ben’s heart seized in his chest at the innocence of her question. His mother, ever the picture of strength, didn’t miss a beat.

“Yes, I am.” she answered, kissing Luna’s head, “I’ve missed them very much.”

Luna nodded firmly. “They’ve missed you too.”

Ben froze, turning to Rey to find an equally shocked expression on her face.

“How do you know that?” Leia prodded gently.

“They told me.” Luna said matter-of-factly. “I talk to them in my dweams.” Luna sat up then, suddenly energized. “Will you talk to me in my dweams too?”

“I…” Leia stuttered, dumbfounded by this sudden revelation. “Y-yes. Yes, of course I will. We all will.”

“Otay.” Luna nodded. “Papa will like that.”

Leia gaped down at her, at a loss for words, until Luna settled in tightly against her side, closing her eyes with a tiny smile. “Will you sing my song Nana?”

Overcome with emotion, Leia could only nod, lest she breakdown in front of her granddaughter. Ben grabbed Rey, holding her against him as he trembled through the overwhelming sadness. He couldn’t fathom how his mother could manage it, but she gathered herself somehow, her raspy voice beginning the very same lullaby she’d lulled him to sleep with as a child.

> “ _Mirrorbright, shines the moon, its glow as soft as an ember_
> 
> _When the moon is mirrorbright, take this time to remember_
> 
> _Those you have loved but are gone…”_

Her voice broke then, unable to continue. Rey pulled away immediately, taking his hand and dragging him back into their daughter’s bedroom, the next verse falling quietly from her lips.

> _“Those who kept you so safe and warm_
> 
> _The mirrorbright moon lets you see_
> 
> _Those who have ceased to be…”_

Leia’s eyes were red brimmed and shining in the lamplight, but Luna opened her eyes and beamed at her mother, her smile pulling him through the darkness as Rey looked to him to join. Swallowing down the tears that sat waiting to spill forth, he opened his mouth, joining his wife as they finished the verse as one. 

> _“Mirrorbright shines the moon, as fires die to their embers_
> 
> _Those you loved are with you still—_
> 
> _The moon will help you remember_ ”

They sat there together in silence as the song came to its conclusion, the lyrics taking on new meaning in the last Princess of Alderaan’s final moments. Rey held Leia’s hand tightly in her own, providing the kind of anchoring strength that she’d provided him countless times before.

“I love you, Nana.” Luna said finally, laying back on her pillow, her little loth-cat held tightly at her side.

“I love you too, my Moonlight.” Leia replied, pressing a long kiss to Luna’s forehead as she pulled the blankets up around her “Don’t you ever forget that.”

Rey had hugged Leia goodbye on the patio that night, both woman overcome with fondness and love and gratitude. And then Leia had turned to him, taking his outstretched arm and letting him guide her down to the beach.

The moment their feet hit the sand, he knew their time was up. They’d had more time than ever expected, and yet it still didn’t feel like enough.

“Mom…” He started, his voice breaking.

“Shhhh.” She shook her head, silencing him with a hand reached up to his cheek. “It’s alright.”

Her eyes were bright, wide, and oh so beautiful. While he loved looking at the deep hazel depths of Rey’s own eyes, in this moment he found himself grateful that he’d managed to pass these deep brown orbs onto their daughter. He didn’t know what he would do if he never had their knowing wisdom looking back at him again, grounding him and reminding him of what was most important.

She gently pushed at his cheek, forcing him to look up at the smile lighting up her face. “I am so proud of you.”

His vision glazed over as his blinked down the well of tears that could not longer be held at bay. She pulled him down slightly, holding his face between her hands as she pressed a kiss to his temple, holding him there to savor the moment as long as she could.

Then, with one last loving glance, she turned toward the water, where a familiar mischievous smile stood calmly, waiting to welcome his sister into the next life.

Luke met his eyes carefully, acknowledging him with a simple nod. Leia turned back, just step away from the water’s edge, one last silent goodbye passing between them.

With a nod of his own, both to acknowledge the uncle he could no longer bring himself to hate and to say one final goodbye to the mother he loved so much, he let go of the breath he’d been holding in silent acceptance

She hesitated for a moment, and then turned, placing her hand in her brother’s glowing blue one.

And then she was gone, disappearing without a trace.

Rey joined him then, silently standing by his side, his hand finding its way into hers.

“I still feel her.” She said gently, staring out at the spot where Leia had stood mere moments before.

“Yes.” He swallowed, a wet, salty smile finding its way onto his face. “Yes, I do too.”

_________________________________________

The celebration of the life Princess Leia Organa-Solo had taken place a month later in Theed. It had been a beautiful, sunny spring day, exactly how she would have wanted it. The Senate gathered in full, as did every remaining Resistance member, and all of the children who survived those who had not. All surviving descendants of Alderaan made the trip, or sent words of gratitude for the woman who would’ve been their queen. The Mon Calamari came out in surprising numbers, as did the Ewoks of Endor, and Chewbacca’s entire family from Kashyyyk. All in all, the funeral attendees spanned the length of the street leading up the palace steps, where Ben, Rey and Luna stood, Chewbacca, Threepio, Lando Calrissian and Queen Milané at their side.  

Poe Dameron had given the eulogy at Ben’s insistence, knowing full well that he would never be able to do justice to his mother’s legacy as a rebel and a fighter, if he could even choke out any words at all. Dameron had been surprised, not least of all because their relationship was still hardly what one would describe as friendly. But he’d accepted dutifully. And in the end, without a dry eye to be found, Ben was glad for the decision.

“Leia Amidala Skywalker Organa Solo.” Poe had started. “At one point or another, she held all those names. To some of us, she was a Princess, to others a Senator or a General. To a lucky few, she was family.” He’d looked back to them with a small, sad smile. “To me, Leia was a hero. One of the rare few who not only lived up to her reputation, but also, somehow, exceeded it. But perhaps above all else, she was a friend…”

“Damn it Dameron.” Lando had choked out from Ben’s side when Poe concluded. “I thought I was going to be able to keep it together today.”

When Poe had returned to their side, he’d clapped a hand of Ben’s shoulder, meeting his eyes as if to say ‘thank you’ before turning to hug Rey and kiss Luna’s head. And in that moment Ben decided that Poe Dameron was alright. Maybe even more than alright, although he’d reserve final judgement for another day. One where he had dry eyes and a clear head.

Rey seemed to sense the shifting fondness, smiling up at him knowingly as she grabbed for his hand.

It was with this shifting comradery in mind that he joined Dameron, Rey and Luna on their patio now, Rey having invited her closest friends back to their home for the first time following the celebration. They’d seen them all plenty since they’d moved out here, of course. Whether it had been at Finn and Rose’s wedding, small gatherings at the apartment they kept in Theed, or at more official meetings throughout the galaxy. Varykino had remained their private sanctuary though, somewhere no one would know to look if they did not want to be found. But with Leia gone, and organizational shifts taking place to make up for her absence, Rey insisted it was time.

Luna reached for him as soon as she saw him walking their way, and he plucked her from Rey’s arms before wrapping his own around her waist, gently brushing against the budding life tucked safely inside her womb.

They found out mere days after Leia’s passing, as if this baby was the Force’s way of replacing her. Rey hadn’t wanted to tell anyone yet, feeling that it would somehow overshadow the importance of this day. So for now, it was their precious secret; a private happiness to fill the void left behind without a mother’s love.

At first he’d been upset, resentful that this child would never know her like Luna had. But Rey quickly quashed the thought. The Force always found a way, she reminded him, and this child would feel Leia’s love just as much as Luna did. The circle of life would continue on as it always had, death paving the way for new life, darkness slipping away as a new dawn peaked up over the horizon. And between it all was the Force, connecting them all, even from beyond.

“This place is beautiful Ben.” Rose called out in awe, walking out of the villa with Finn at her side. “You said it belonged to your grandmother’s family?”

He nodded, pressing a kiss to Luna’s cheek. “My mother never knew until much later in life. And by then she had no use for such a place.”

Finn rushed over to the edge of the balcony, looking out at the water. “Well, General Organa was crazy to turn down a place like this. It’s incredible!”

Rey took his hand in her own and gently caressed their daughter’s face, a smile lighting up her face as she nodded in agreement. “It is. We are very grateful.”

Ben stiffened then, his eyes falling inexplicably on Poe Dameron, whose mouth had fallen open as if in shock. He knew why immediately. He’d seen it in his mind, all those years ago, when he’d been held prisoner in that old imperial bunker on Endor. The vision of the little girl, the one they now knew to be Luna, and the happy family, gathered here in this place, with Finn marveling over the beauty, somehow content to be standing there with their enemy who was now something more like a friend.

Ben chuckled slightly, despite himself, nodding knowingly at Dameron, whose own face was now alight with his own signature smile. Rey looked between them questioningly, asking for an explanation through their bond.

 _He saw this_ . Ben answered. _In a dream, long ago_.

Rey smiled then, nodding in understanding. There had been many dreams, all of which had somehow become their reality. One far better than any of them would have imagined at the time.

“Daddy,” Luna yawned widely, reaching up to run a hand through Ben’s hair. “I wanna go talk to Nana now.”

Poe, Finn and Rose’s heads all whipped around, stunned. Poe’s eyes flew from Rey to Ben and then back, trying to understand.

Rey just laughed, taking Luna from Ben’s arms. “Alright sweetheart. You’ll tell Nana that everyone says hello, won’t you?”

Luna nodded, rubbing her eyes as she buried her face in her mother’s neck.

Rey leaned up for quick kiss and then she turned back toward the house, Luna in tow, leaving him alone with her three shell-shocked friends, all of whom were still gaping after her like they’d just seen a ghost.

“So, I’m confused.” Finn finally said, the furrow of his brow so deep it was almost comical.

Ben ran his hand through his hair anxiously, shifting on his feet. “Uh… well, you see...”

“Let me guess.” Poe interrupted, a smirk forming slowly on his face. “It’s a Force thing.”

Ben just shrugged. “Yeah, basically.”

Finn’s head whipped back and forth between Poe and Ben, as if there was still some inside joke that he was missing.

“Alright.” He proclaimed finally, setting off toward the villa with a dramatic head shake. “Where did Max run off to? I need a drink.”

Rose and Poe just laughed, moving to follow after him as Poe delivered a firm clap to Ben’s shoulder. Ben waited behind for a moment, watching them go, aware on some level that everything had changed.

These people were, for better or worse, his friends now. They’d given up everything for Rey, and for Leia. They’d put aside their misgivings and placed their trust in him. And, perhaps most importantly, each of them loved his family with a fierceness to rival his own.

No matter what happened, Rey and Luna would always have a family to take care of them. They’d always have arms to hold them, shoulders to cry on, patient ears to listen to them. If the day ever came that he could not be there for them, he knew without a shadow of a doubt that they would _never_ be alone.

He couldn’t help but be grateful for that. He couldn’t help but be grateful for _them_.

Ben’s feet began to move him back toward the house when a breeze washed over him, carrying with it a love so blindingly bright it stopped him in his tracks. He turned quickly, looking over his shoulder and finding the source staring back at him. Five sets of eyes, shrouded in a blue glow, with smiles that reached into the depths of their souls. Five sets of eyes that all said _I love you_.

It was the last set, the hazel orbs that had last looked upon amidst a glow of crimson on a dark bridge, that he looked to now.

Han Solo stood beside his mother, arm draped casually over her shoulders, the familiar smirk he’d once sought so fervently plastered on his rugged face.

He opened his mouth, knowing there were no words that could possibly capture everything he wanted, he _needed_ , to say to his father. But Han cut him off with a simple shake of his head.

“I know, Ben.” He said simply. “ _I know_.”

“Ben?” Rose called out, forcing him to look away from the visages of his family. “Are you coming? Lando’s dug up an old bottle of Toniray! We don’t want to start without you.”

He nodded, turning back to find them gone, disappearing with the wind. But they weren’t gone. Not really. His family was always there, inside his heart, inside his soul.

And they would always be there, waiting to welcome him home when, many years from now, the day came.

Smiling, he turned away, back toward the home where his daughter slept, where his wife carried another budding lifeform, and where their friends sat waiting for them, sharing in their joys and their heartache. This was his family too. The one they’d made for themselves.

He joined Rey and the other’s in the kitchen of their home, where they’d already began dolling out glasses of the rare Alderaanian wine. Together they would honor and celebrate a life well lived, one that had, in some way, brought them all together, with the knowledge that she would want them all to go on living, to go on fighting, to go on protecting those who could not protect themselves.

Rey wrapped her free arm around him, holding him close and beaming up at him proudly as, together with the three Tico’s, Chewbacca, and Lando, they raised a glass to toast his mother’s life and legacy.

And as he drifted off to sleep that night, Rey snoring gently against his chest, her loose hair tickling his face as he ducked down to press a firm kiss to her head, he found himself smiling.

Tomorrow was a new day, and there was so much to look forward to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is with tears flowing profusely that I now officially say goodbye to this story, thankful that I somehow managed to time the end to hit exactly one week before we FINALLY get our first taste of Episode IX. 
> 
> For everyone that has come along on this journey, thank you. Truly. Your comments have helped me keep going, and have provided countless smiles when I've needed them most. I love this fandom, especially all of the glorious, talented Reylos that keep bringing incredible content to the table. 
> 
> I have a few more story ideas up my sleeve (WWII AU, Competing Vigilante's, etc...) and if there's enough interest, perhaps I'll be able to crank them out for you. Until then, it is with a heavy heart that I lay Scales of Fate to rest, grateful for all of you, and for these characters, all of whom inspire me on daily basis. I can't wait to see how all their stories end.


End file.
